Writing Technique: Novel Treatment

Written for:  Carpe Diem Tanka Splendor #22 Teika’s 8th Tanka Writing Technique – Novel Treatment (prompt: blues)

Novel treatment – Using an unusual or original poetic conception

river of tears.jpg

Among the 26 examples is the poem by Fujiwara Motozane (ca 950) from the Shinkokinshū, #11:1060:

a river of tears
floats my body off
on its current
but it cannot quell the fire
you have set in my heart

As we look closer to this tanka (or waka) we can see in the first lines what is meant here “a river of tears floats my body off” This sounds unusual, but it is used for poetic conception to make the emotion stronger in this tanka.

Here is my attempt:

blue ice cracks
tears fall in misshapen pool
a face appears
unlike melting ice blocks
no fissures exist here

http://chevrefeuillescarpediem.blogspot.nl/

About purplepeninportland

I am a freelance poet, born and bred in Brooklyn, New York. I live with my husband, John, and two charming rescue dogs–Marion Miller and Murphy. We spent eight lovely years in Portland, OR, but are now back in New York. My goal is to create and share poetry with others who write, or simply enjoy reading poetry. I hope to touch a nerve in you, and feel your sparks as well.
This entry was posted in Purple's Home and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Writing Technique: Novel Treatment

  1. Amrit Sinha says:

    This is beautiful … emotions wonderfully expressed.

    Like

Comments are closed.